Working with the urge to lash out.
GIVE helps us…
· Communicate needs effectively
· Maintain important relationships
· Promote healthy communication
· Improves relationship
Gentleness – Be nice. Be Respectful. No attacks, threats, judging or sneering
Interest – Listen and appear interested. Don’t interrupt. Patience
Validate – Show you understand. Support. Empathy (be in their shoes)
Easy manner – Humor. Softness. No attitude. Let go of being right
Consider: how do I want the other person to feel about me after our communication?
Wise Mind Living Video Collection: Mini Mindfulness Break
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“Intense Sensations” is a Distress Tolerance skill to use when you are feeling intense emotions. It is especially good to use with panic, anger, disgust, & jealousy. Yet, it can also be used with other emotion’s. The premise is that it tricks the brain to go to the new “Intense Sensation” and therefore the brain shifts and stops sending out messages for the unwanted emotional experience. This will not take the emotion away entirely, but will bring it down enough that you can better manage the emotion, OR enough so you don’t act out.
Safe Intense Ideas
· Put ice cubes in hand; hold until you can’t anymore
· Put 1 or 2 Warhead candies in your mouth
· Use COLD water on hands & face
· Short burst of Intense exercise
· Put a lime or lemon wedge in your mouth
· Put an atomic bomb candy in your mouth (must be intense)
· Put a Jalapeno in your mouth
· Put a “VERY Strong” mint in your mouth
· Put pop rocks candy in your mouth
Trauma treatment involves accessing one’s imagination and innate creativity, enhancing competence and taking effective action in the goal to be in charge of yourself. Bessel van der Kolk
“We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing!” ― George Bernard Shaw
The Acceptance Skills are often the most difficult. “Willingness” is a skill that helps us move toward “Radical Acceptance”. “Willingness” is being willing, or open, to doing something that might be difficult, because it is what is needed. Wise Mind opens us up to being more willing in our lives.
The purpose is to transform stubbornness and denial that keeps us stuck, into “Willingness” to participate, to move forward, and to do the hard, but helpful work, we need.
Do what is needed for the situation you are dealing with. Open yourself up to being willing.
Try “Willing Hands”: If your body and mind feel rigid or stuck, open the top of your palms up fully and place upwards on your lap. Then take a few deep breathes. Take a moment to “Observe” if you feel more willing.
Do you, or your loved one, experience flashbacks?
Most of us understand a flashback as being a memory w/ images & pictures. It is important to understand that flashbacks are any of the following emotional content coming up intrusively:
· Body Memories (Body Sensations)
· Sudden Emotions/Feelings
· Auditory Memories
· Racing, Paranoid, or Obsessive Thinking
· Pictures, images, symbols
· Sudden Somatic Experiences: pain, loss of sight, paralysis, fainting, etc.